


An Evening at the Christmas Circus

by LadyOfDoom



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Christmas, Circus, F/M, Mind Games, Mind Reading, Multi Doctor Story, Multi-Era, Post-Episode: s02e04 The Girl in the Fireplace, Post-Episode: s07e12 The Crimson Horror, Post-Episode: s10e09 The Empress of Mars, Psychic Abilities, Psychic Alien, Ten being thick and Twelve getting it, any excuse getting Eleven to a circus, implied past Doctor/Master, jealous Rose, maybe Clara/Bill we will see
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-27
Updated: 2019-01-01
Packaged: 2019-09-28 20:26:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17189825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyOfDoom/pseuds/LadyOfDoom
Summary: It is Christmas time once again. After almost being abandoned on the spaceship Madame de Pompadour, Rose decides to take a break from traveling with the Doctor and evaluating their relationship. Instead of time travel she goes to the Circus with her Mum. In the attempt to avoid him, however, Rose encounters two of his future instances. Twelve and Eleven happen to hang around and cause a night to remember, at least for their companions. Bill wants to invite Twelve to the Circus as a Christmas present, so he may help her looking for a cute dancer she met a decade in the future. Meanwhile Eleven and Clara are hunting a psychic alien, hiding between the circus folks.This year will be no Christmas special? Well Whovians make due and write their own.





	1. Chameleon Circus

“So here we are.” Bill smiled a wide grin, as they entered the tent. Her jumper was all green and red, with a chubby little Santa on it. Her skinny jeans were meant to make good for the seasonal goofiness in terms of sexy. “Merry Christmas.”

The Doctor’s prominent eyebrows were furrowed in annoyance. “This was not necessary.”

“Oh, nonsense” his student and latest companion smiled gleefully. “It is Christmas. Everyone should get a present, especially you.”

“No, really.” The Doctor shot back, his Scottish accent only underlining how cross he was. “This was absolutely and totally not necessary. I would have rather you didn’t. Let’s just go back and have some of Nardole’s turkey instead, before he eats it up all by himself.” He managed to grin while his tone of voice sounded patronizing. “You lot like turkey, right? Doesn’t turkey sound nice?” Nardole had managed to dodge a bullet with this excuse, albeit someone had to watch Missy while he was gone.

“It will be fine.” Bill's smile did not falter and she managed to lead him towards their seats.

“No, really, it won’t, you have never seen him eat.” The Dorctor’s glare shot back to the entrance.

“Doctor” Bill mused and shoved him along their row.

“It’s like the chunk, chunk, chunk of an industrial cutter.”

“Doctor.” There was only a slight warning in her sunny demeanor. “The tickets were not cheap and I really would love to spend a nice evening with you. So will you be so kind and not give me graphic depictions of Nardole’s eating habits, thanks very much?”

The Doctor sighed and nodded “Fine.”

“Thank you.” His companion beamed at his giving in.

He crossed his arms. “I am not saying this wasn’t a nice idea. I am just saying I could have brought you to an actual circus, a proper alien one, with smash and thunder, for free. This is just, you know, an ordinary humany circus.” Beaten he sat down and looked around.

It was obvious Bill had spent some money on the tickets. The tent’s great cycle was packed with rows of seats that ascended to the back of the yellow and red fabric. Blue and red light swayed over the yet empty circus stage, while people sat down expectantly. There were many children with their parents, excitement in their faces. Some people were in elegant attire, while others wore jumpers closer to what Bill preferred today.

Something about this tent felt oddly familiar.

“How did you choose this place?” The Doctor asked and shot Bill a weary look. “And why did it have to be 2006? If we had to use the TARDIS anyways, why not go anywhere but London 2006.”

Bills smile became a little strained, but she managed to keep it while turning a little guilty looking. “Met a girl at a bar.”

“That seems to happen to you.” The Doctor stated with a natural demeanor.

“She was cute. Turns out, she worked as a dancer in this circus.” She opened her arms and showed around them. “Ta-Da.”

“Hang on, I still don’t see why it had to be this year?” He crossed his arms, little impressed with her gesture.

“Well, you see…” Bill moved uncomfortably in her seat. “I convinced her to go out with me… And in the process I may had to tell her, I saw her performance. Now sadly her last circus act was in 2006. When I'll meet up with her again, I will know everything about the show.” Bill scratched her arm, lost in thought. “I mean, if I don’t know anything about it, what would that look like?”

“Like you cheated your way into the date with a lie.” The Doctor gave back straight away, judgement in his voice.

“That was harsh Doctor, even for you.” Bill folded her arms and looked at her teacher. He was her friend and her professor, not her father.

“But it’s true isn’t it?”

“Maybe…” Bill nodded a little. “But I am here seeing the show, aren’t I? So there is no lie after all.” She paused a little vindictive after being scolded. “Better than dating a scary lady in a fault.”

The Doctor looked affronted. “How many times—” He sighed. “She is my prisoner, we are not dating.” He crossed his arms, anger in his eyes.

“Not currently? Or not ever?” Bill grinned.

The Doctor uncrossed his harms and threw them in the air, but he stayed silent.

“So not currently.” Bill concluded.

Her companion huffed. “Besides, that makes this not a Christmas present.” He showed around the room. “It makes me your, what, wing man?”

“Kind of?” She sounded unsure. Finally the hint of a smile found the Doctor’s face. This went not past Bill, who had actually hoped her friend would have some fun tonight, so she corrected: “Totally, yea.”

The Doctor leaned back and slipped his sonic glasses out of his pocket. With the hoody and sunglasses combination he seemed like a grandpa trying to pretend-play a teenager. Bill knew he could pose a striking figure, if he chose to do so. Today he did not, but that was fine. It was Christmas and as long as the Doctor felt comfortable and had some fun tonight, something that took his thoughts of off Missy, well mission accomplished.

“Let’s have a look then, shall we?” He straightened his glasses and was actually interested to hear the background music stop for the show to start.

 

~~~

 

“Common, Rose!” Jackie shouted over the noise of the last entering audience members alongside them. “They are already turning down the lights.”

Rose nodded and followed her mother to their assigned seats. They had to squeeze their way along a row of annoyed people, all giving them the side eye for stepping on their feet and into their view, while the show began. Finally they sat down and shoved away their jackets. A colorful dressed harlequin welcomed them to the ‘Circus Chameleon’ and thanked them for coming. Another young looking fellow in a more modern clown costume appeared. He started to make fun of his partner, just out of the harlequin’s sight, but clear to see for the audience. Apparently, they were giving a straight guy and goofy guy performance.

“Over there.” Jackie smiled and tried to bring the younger one to Rose’s attention.

Her daughter nodded with a smile and tried to encourage her Mum with a pretend interested look to listen closely. However, Rose could only really enjoy the show half-heartedly.

She did not expect anything from this evening. Her Mum had won the tickets for this Christmas circus at a fair tombola the other day. Originally, Jackie had been planning to go with her current boyfriend, but they had broken up the flimsy affair just days before Christmas Eve. After the let-down, Rose had decided to come along and cheer up her Mum a little. It was, however, due to her current annoyance with the Doctor, that she had decided to do this instead of banshee tracking in ancient Mesopotamia. He had not insisted on her coming along or anything, but he had seemed surprised at how casual she sent him on his way, not even inviting him for Christmas. He definitely knew something was up, but he obviously did not know what, and he had not bothered to ask.

Rose was happy he had not. No point in talking about it.

She knew it was stupid. She knew it was childish. There was no right reason to be jealous. The Doctor was her friend, her best mate, her companion as much as she was his. But however close they had grown, she knew they would never be lovers. Certainly not because Rose choose so, but because he had often enough made clear, less with his words and more with his actions, that this was out of the question. His way to retreat whenever they got too close, told volumes. And it was fine. It was okay. She was happy with the way thinks went. There was no way she would try and pressure him into anything he did not want, especially since everything was actually and definitely fine. It would just make things strange; he might feel bothered and retreat completely. One day he might say bye as always and then never come back again. She thought of Sarah Jane and swallowed hard, hardly catching anything of the acrobatics shown in the circus ring.

Rose was happy he had not asked about her mood, because she did not want to make a scene, did not want him to see how jealous she was. This whole Madame de Pompadour affair had caught her off guard.

And there it was again, her thoughts returned to that dreadful moment.

“Rose, look!” Jackie pointed at a couple of acrobats floating on a swing high up, stretching and swirling around each other. Rose looked, but was happy her Mother’s attention was fixed on the couple and not on her darkened expression.

He had just gone and did it, went through the damn time window. Recklessly, he had smashed the glass and destroyed his own way back to help and rescue the lover of Louis XV. And while Rose was so very proud of him for being the kind, brave and courageous Time Lord he was, she could not suppress a sting of her heart. Her mood fell to the Earth’s molten core whenever she realized, he had risked her life (and Mickey’s for that matter) in order to safe Ranette. As far as he might have known, she and Mickey would have been stuck on the dead spaceship, with only the TARDIS to keep them company. They would not have been able to pilot her.

Of course, Rose had not realized this in the moment the horse had smashed the mirror. It had only dawned on her, in the hours they had been waiting for his return. She knew however, the Doctor had thought of it the moment he had made the jump. And while Rose understood enough of time travel by now, to know the Doctor might have gone and taken the slow path to save them at a different point of his time line, he had had no assurance, he would be able to pull that off. All the while, he would have been living a happy banana daiquiri filled life as the lover of the lover of the King of France, while Rose did not even understand, what made him retreat from her.

Clapping and cheering went through the building, when the couple descended from the sky. Without really realizing it, Rose joined in. Luckily her deep sigh went past her mother, who was taken by the show.

Rose had assumed it was because she was human. He had hinted to it at some points, but so was Ranette. In conclusion, it was her. He just did not feel for her that way, the way he obviously had felt for the French courtesan after only such a short amount of time. The look on his face when he had returned to the TARDIS. It was like someone had blown out the light behind his eyes, the fire that made him go on and rescue and fight and love the Universe even after all these years of experiencing it. But of course, he would not talk to her about it. Just another weight on the burden of his long disappointment filled life as a lonely protector. Feelings he did not want to share with her.

She was happy he had not asked what was wrong, because how in the world was she supposed to tell him, that she was jealous with no right to be. He _had_ come back and he _had_ in fact saved them. So there was no reason to pout, right? Wrong. She felt left out, left behind and frankly replaceable. Given the opportunity, he would have brought Ranette along for the ride. Where would this have left Rose? Jealous and angry over something she had no right to be. The worst in all this was that in some part of her heart, she felt happy the Doctor had missed the window of opportunity, had missed the chance to bring Ranette along. And it made her feel sick to the stomach, since it only caused her dear Doctor pain, and made her feel like a stupid ape. The thought of her first Doctor and simpler times, without Mickey, without Ranette without a horse stalking the halls of the TARDIS, gave her bad mood a new shade of miserable.

The rows and rows of people cheered in union. It had been a bad idea to come, since she could not enjoy the moment for her brooding. At least her mother seemed to be happy, clapping along to the beat. They all clapped along to the beat. At some point in human history people had just decided to clap to cheer people on. Rose would remember to ask the Doctor if there was any biological reason for this humany thing or if someone had just started a trend and it stuck. She laughed at the thought. It was the kind of thinking traveling with the Doctor put in one’s head. It was also the kind of trend, the Doctor turned out to have started.

The clap, clap, clap went through the room like thunder, causing the artists to give their best. The noise muffled the shrieking and breathing sound, so familiar to Rose. Only because of that familiarity, she was able to hear the TARDIS materialize in another part of the circus, nothing of the time ship was to be seen however.

 


	2. The Chosen Stage

With a pleasant thunk the TARDIS landed nice and easy for a change. Within the last month or so Clara had gained too many blue spots for her liking. For once she was standing save and sound on both her feet.

“Here we are then.” The Doctor finished the landing process of the TARDIS by switching some buttons. “London, 2006.” The screen showed the inside of a circus tent. “Clearly our friend did not choose a random spot in time or space.” He fixed his bow tie and seemed alarmed by the readings on screen.

“Are we on its heels?” Clara grinned and stepped next to the Doctor.

“Couple of days behind maybe. But it needs at least a week or so to recharge the engines. If they have not totally failed it yet” Immediately, he moved around the center of his beloved ship and finished slotting several different metal parts into a bulky looking space weapon. Thick cables connected the massive cannon with the central console of the ship. “The psychic mind compensator is finished and fully charged.”

“I thought we do not use weapons.” She looked down at the cannon.

“This is just a last resort kind of thing.” He swayed his dangling hands as usual, before rubbing them together with more purpose. “No psychic being in the universe would risk getting hit by this.” The Doctor patted the makeshift gadget and disconnected the cables. “It will help us catch it and bring it back to _Volag-Noc_. As soon as it sees the weapon it will come along nicely, I bet.” He nodded proud. After all, he had built the compensator in no-time, while tracking the _Arkarey_ to Earth of all places and piloting the ship at the same time.

Clara looked unconvinced. “Will it?”

“Probably” the Doctor corrected, which made her frown only grow more unconvinced.

“Well hopefully” he admitted.

Her raising her eyebrows made his head sink between his shoulders. “Oh, well. It will most certainly help a little.”

“Why build a functioning weapon though?” Clara watched how the Doctor raised the metal chunk with ease and moved it to one of the console tables, away from the middle, adjusting last bits. “Why not build a pretend one, to make sure there is no one injured?”

“Have you not been listening?” The Doctor had his affronted tone and face right at hand. “We are hunting a psychic, Clara, a psychic mind reading alien. He would know, it is a fake by looking into my head.”

“I thought it is a shape shifter?” Clara asked confused. She was sure, when they had tracked the alien thought the halls of the planet prison's main complex it had changed its appearance several times.

“Well, yes, but no, maybe a little, actually no not at all.” Apparently his preparations were done, so he turned towards her. “You see, it does not actually change its form, rather than project the image it wants you to see, right into your head.” He pressed his pointer finger to her forehead and watched her bounce back a little. “That is why we have to be careful. It cannot make you see hallucinations or control your mind, but it can see into your head. Mess with your feelings. Impersonate someone you trust.”

Clara nodded in understanding. “That explains why I saw it turn into granny Oswald, my mate from school and my high school sweetheart.”

The Doctor nodded and made his way towards the doors, a dark cloud suddenly over his head. “It impersonates your loved ones, yes. _Arkareies_ feast on the negative feelings of empathic beings, like you and I. It reminds you of a past grievance or creates one by impersonating people you know. It will take on the form of your lover and brake up with you, just to feast off the heartbreak.”

“So, I will have to question anyone and anything I see, right?” Clara followed him.

“Exactly.” He held up the door for her. “Let’s have a look around first.”

His face was turned away, but she could see in the way he held himself, this would not be an easy chase for him. Yet, there was no going around this. Since they had broken into _Volag-Noc_ to answer to the message on the Doctor’s psychic paper and accidentally freed the prisoner, who had sent it, they had to get it back to where it belonged. The biggest question on Clara’s mind, however, was if the alien that apparently had looked into both their heads, had chosen London 2006, the year after her mother’s death, because of Clara or because of the Doctor.

“Oh, and don’t let it touch you.” He warned almost causally while following her through the doors. “If it touches you, it can mess with your body functions, by intersecting the brain. It wears off after a while, but let’s not take any risks.”

“I will give my best.” Clara laughed a little worried. After all, she felt it was not entirely up to her if the psychic prisoner would manage to touch her during the chase.

 

~~~

 

After excusing herself to go and look for the restrooms, Rose made her way behind the auditorium. It was about the direction she figured the TARDIS must have landed, at least if her ears were still to trust. She rounded a corner, hardly anyone around underneath the metal construction, and there she was: The distinct blue box.

Despite the mixed feelings she was harbouring at the moment, the sight made her smile. She ran up to the time ship, realizing shape and design had changed a little. Her finger traced over the St John ambulance badge, that had not been there when Rose had said bye to the Doctor the other day. But since her key fit the lock perfectly, there was no doubt, that this was the Doctor’s TARDIS.

When she entered, however, something else seemed odd. All was dark moody light and metal casings. Rose blinked. The TARDIS made a humming breath, greeting her. In the blink of an eye, the interior changed and became the familiar console room of coral pillars, orange glow and turquoise shine. Rose blinked again, now confused. Was the earlier interior an interface the Doctor used when he was alone? Or was he thinking of changing the console room’s design? Rose shrugged it off but made a mental note to ask him about it later on.

The Time Lord was nowhere to be found.

Everything seemed as it should be, except there was a dangerous looking weapon laying on one of the slightly yellow jump seats. Knowing there was no playing around with strange alien objects, especially when they looked like weapons, she stayed away from it.

“Doctor?” Rose’s voice echoed throughout the room and she circled around the console. But except the quiet hum of the ship no one answered. The TARDIS gave an apologetic rasp and Rose understood he was not home. He must have gone out to look for her.

“Typical”, she sighed and turned to make her way back to the exit. “See you later, Babe.”

Before she could move much, though, the doors opened all by themselves. At first Rose assumed the ship wanted to be polite, but then she realized somebody way entering.

“Hold on, Clara.” A stranger’s voice made Rose flinch before its owner entered. “Need to get the mind compensator.”

Startled, the blonde stepped back towards the buttons and levers of the control centre. The stranger did not see her thanks to its central pillar. He closed the door and turned, looking around in confusion.

 _Figures_ , Rose thought. _The bigger on the inside bit is hard to digest for most. How did he get in, though?_

“What are you doing, old girl?” He muttered under his breath. Rose could hardly make out any of the words. “Are you recycling?”

When he stepped towards the console and into the light, Rose got a moment to take in his figure. He wore a long purple suit jacket over a grey waistcoat. A light shirt and a dark bow tie finished the look, that gave him something of a young professor. His brown hair was combed back to one side, but the foremost strands seemed to do as they pleased, falling into his eyes and prominent brow. His chin was just as prominent, currently quivering in confusion, obviously contemplating something. He was handsome, Rose found, although fairly strange looking. There was darkness in his eyes, but a jumpy step suggested a good natured person. All lean and lanky, he stepped towards the middle of the room.

The second she deemed him harmless enough and decided to approach him, he noticed her.

The strangers eyes went wide, he froze. Rose blinked as their eyes met. She breathed in to ask him, who he was, but the question never left her lips.

“How dare you?” The sheer rage in his voice had her on edge right away. He came upon her like a hawk, still all lanky but with a sudden precision in his step. Rose jumped back instantly. “How dare you impersonate her?”

“What?” Rose brought forth and tried to keep the console between them. It sounded small and weak, all trenched in surprise. “Who are you?”

“Get out of my head, you filthy leech.” He emphasized every word. After they almost had circled the console once, his hand went straight for the strange looking gun, before Rose could even think about snatching it away. “Of course, you would come here for her. No coincidences. Well, I hope you are having the feast of your lifetime. I am guessing you do. However, it will be your last, if you do not stop staining her memory.”

“Who are you?” Rose demanded again, louder this time, while raising her hands out of fear. He had her at gunpoint. “Doctor?” she shouted into the general direction of the other rooms, never leaving her eyes of the weapon wielding lunatic. Maybe she was mistaken. Maybe he was still inside? “Look mate, I don’t know who you are, but the Doctor will be back here any minute now. So, don’t do anything stupid.”

“Oh, yes, very clever.” He laughed, it was cruel and cold. His rage was replaced by silent despair. “Of course, she wouldn’t recognize me, would she now.” It seemed her words only added oil to the fuel of the stranger’s anger. “You think I would fall for your charade? I know what a convincing performance your lot can give. Now get out of my head.” He spoke the last words through gritting teeth. When he pressed a button on the massive weapon it made a buzzing sound. “I won’t say it again.” Another high pitched sound seemed to indicate that the gun was loaded.

Understanding dawned upon Rose. She looked into his eyes again and put together what he had said. Still unsure she tried: “No, stop, wait, I _am_ Rose Tyler.”

She tried to evade him, by moving around the console once more, but she was not quick enough. The shot went through the room with a crackle. Yellow light met Rose’s head and swept her off her feet. She screamed.

 

~~~

 

The reoccurring theme of strict harlequin and goofy clown did not amuse the Doctor as much as it seemed to amuse Bill and the rest of the audience. His dry demeanour and gloomy look softened however, when he heard the children laugh gleefully over the shenanigans of the younger actor. He rather understood the sentiment of the other one though.

It dawned on him again, that all this seemed way too familiar. “I think I have been in one of their shows before.” He squinted underneath his sonic glasses. Bill could see it from her seat.

She looked genuinely upset about that. “Won’t it be boring then?” Of course she had had her ulterior motives when inviting him and making him use the TARDIS in order to make it possible, but she wanted him to have a nice time still.

“I really couldn’t tell.” The Doctor sounded alert all of a sudden. “Must have been a while back, I don’t remember all that much. Now, why is that, I wonder.” He straightened his glasses with purpose. There was something else going on, there had to be, there always was. “The finale was a smash though, I think.”

Bill was about to ask a follow up question, when the light changed and a new song began to play. “There she is.” Full of excitement she pointed at the appearing dancers. A group of six girls in skimpy looking outfits was supposed to distract the audience while others reworked the stage for the next act.

The Doctor fixed his glasses again, for the first time curious, since they had entered the tent. “Which one is your friend?”

“The tall blond at the left.” Bill wanted to wave, but she knew Christy would not see her in-between the rows and rows of people. It was probably better if she did not see her anyways, in the end she might recognize her or something like that.

The Doctor squinted. “The one with the tiny mouth or the one with the wavy bits?”

Bill had to palm her face, despite wanting to see the ladies’ performance. She knew exactly which girls the Doctor was referring to. A blond beauty with a pretty pout was standing next to a girl with a head full of perfectly curled hair. “No the one on the left, Doctor.”

“Ah, I see.” He nodded “The one with the far apart eyes.”

“You are being rude.”

“Just observing.” His glasses swirled with sound, before he exclaimed. “She seems harmless enough. Maybe a little young for you.”

“She is eighteen now.” Bill declared defensive. “And in my time she is ten years older still.”

The Doctor nodded, but he was no longer listening to Bill’s words. His glasses had picked up something new. “Do you smell that?”

Bill sniffed. Her eyes shot to her right and her interest was taken by a little girl shoving popcorn in her face. “We can buy some during the break.”

“That is not what I meant.” He breathed in deeply.

Most times he had to suppress and ignore many of the different sensations he experienced opposed to humans. There was the overlaying smell of the audience, their food, their drinks, their lives. Then there were the artists, their sweat and concentration, the stage, the light and its dust. There was Bill, her clothes, her day and routine stuck within them. There was time and timelines, intermingling. There was the distinct smell of Missy, hanging in his clothes, from his last visit to the fault. A hint of the TARDIS’ artron energy was clinging to both him and Bill, him more than her. However, there was more artron energy than supposed to be. But beyond that there was also a sniff of _Genellium_ , an element, not supposed to be on earth for another three thousand years. And there was something else still, it tugged at his hearts, but he ignored it and acknowledged the problem at hand.

“There is a _Genellium_ based power source within this tent, most likely a generator.” He crossed his arms.

“And that is good?” Bill looked after the girls disappearing behind the curtain.

“No, bad actually.” He checked the data on his glasses. “It is used to power space ships of various varieties, this one most likely to power a rather primitive time traveling vessel. But they have been outlawed in many galaxies for the danger they can pose, when overused or out-dated. The fact that I can smell it, means it is on the verge of a melt-down.”

“A melt-down?” Bill jumped up. “Like a nuclear melt-down, like a giant explosion? Like a fall out melt-down?” She tried to tone her voice down but failed. Luckily the people around her were taken by the show.

The Doctor stood up and started making his way towards the other end of the tent. “The readings are distorted. I can smell it, but the sonic is not able to find it with precision. We will have to look for it ourselves.”

When she saw him stride towards the curtains, probably to enter the back stage area, her panic moved target. “Christy cannot know me yet.”

“Who?” The Doctor chose an entrance point that was removed from most people’s views.

“The girl, my date, Christy?” Bill explained, looking if anyone was watching them move the red velvet aside.

“For her this was ten years back. Now, don’t be paranoid.” He mocked. “Would you rather see London go up in a blast? We will be quick. Probably just some random artifact that got lost and was mistaken as a curious object.”

Bill had a bad feeling about this. She looked around once more to make sure no one followed them, then she moved past the fabric and after the Doctor.


	3. The Future Past

When she fell on her bum, one hand on the railing, the TARDIS was suddenly all dark and metal, just like in the moment she had entered it. A raspy and concerned sound accompanied Rose’s realization that nothing had happened.

The stranger stepped closer, towering over her. His rage gave way to worry as he threw away the gun and kneeled down in front of her. “Rose?”

And then she saw it. His eyes, no longer blue, no longer brown and yet still the Doctors, ancient and kind. “Doctor?”

“It _is_ you!” he exclaimed shocked and grabbed her forearms as if to make sure. When realization finally hit him he moved forward and engulfed her in a fierce hug.

She did not hesitate and closed her arms around his shoulders. He was half sloping over her, almost causing them to fall down the stairs.

“Yes, yes, it is me.” When he moved back to look at her again she asked: “What happened? Did you regenerate? Regeneration sickness? Did the banshee get you? I am so sorry. I should have come with you.”

“The banshee?” Understanding reached his kind, emerald eyes, so threatening just a moment ago. “No, Rose.” He helped her get up and took a step back, obviously trying to regain his countenance. Yet, he did not let go of her hand. “That has been a long while ago for me. I am a future version of your Doctor.” He hit his own head, seemingly not noticing how Rose’s smile faded a little at that. “Oh, of course, it probably used a psychic picture of you to get here in the first place, one it snatched out of my head.”

Rose understood none of those words, however, that was nothing new when talking to the Doctor. She swallowed her sudden sadness and observed: “You just shot me.” While she checked her form, she looked behind herself as if to make sure she hat not lost anything, some bones or vital organs maybe. Touching her head, she tried to hide the confusion and hurt his action and casual words caused her.

“Don’t worry. For a none-psychic it is not dangerous. Biggest thing that could happen is a headache in the morning.” He took her face in his hands and looked into her eyes. She could see in his how sorry he was. “I am hunting a psychic alien. I thought it impersonated you.”

The goofy grin and floppy hair made her laugh despite the tears that were standing in her eyes. This was not her Doctor, of course it was not. This was a stranger in a strange new console room. And this was not like with his last regeneration. This was not about a changing face or new personality features glossing over old ones. This man, holding her face like she was the most precious thing in the world, had not seen her in a long, so very long time. He was not the man, she had said bye to just a few days ago. All the things that must have happened since they had last seen each other, all the possibilities danced in her mind. In any version he was without her. The hurt she had seen in his eyes just before he had shot her, was a searing cut in her heart and told her everything she needed to know.

“I am no longer with you.”

He did not answer right away. Silence came over them. The Doctors hands fell back to his sides, one reached for hers. “It has been a while, yes.”

She wanted to ask him so many things, wanted to know what happened, to her, to him, to them. She wanted to know if he was happy, if they had stayed together for long, if he had lost her or if she had left him. And yet she knew, that none of these questions could be answered, not to her at least, not right now. Thinking of her Doctor, he probably would not even talk with her about it, even if he was not bound by the laws of time and the threat of a paradox. At least that much he had explained to her, when talking about the curse of the last lonely Time Lord. He was bound to see everyone he loved die. She hoped at least she got to spent the rest of her life with him, even though they always knew he would have to go on without her.

So instead she asked: “Can I join in on the alien hunt?”

The Doctor beamed at once “Always.”

It made her smile return. Sometimes it was so easy to lighten his mood. Although she was still annoyed with her own Doctor, she seemed to be so long gone from this Doctor’s past, that her worries simmered down and she wanted to focus on the task at hand.

“Hold on Doctor.” A female voice entered the TARDIS, belonging to a cute brown haired woman, with a short red skirt and a dark blouse. “If the psychic can read that the weapon is not working, it could also know you are not really planning to shoot at it, right?”

Both looked up. When the new stranger’s eyes met their grasped hands they let go of each other simultaneously. Rose immediately felt the loss of his.

Of course he would be traveling with someone else. Rose mostly got over her jealousy regarding other companions, past and future, when she had met Sarah Jane. She was happy if the Doctor had a friend to travel with, especially if Rose was gone.

“Hello.” She greeted the stranger. Why did she have to be so damn pretty, though? “I am Rose Tyler.” Self-conscious she straightened the ribbons on her rose coloured vest.

The woman blinked surprised but then she took the last steps towards the console. All confident, hands to her hips, and a winning smile, she replied:  “Clara Oswald.”

They moved to shake hands. The TARDIS suddenly made a weary sound. All three of them stopped in their tracks and looked up, along the turquoise column.

“What’s the matter with her?” Rose put her hand to the console.

“She does not seem to like me much.” Clara sighed.

“Ah, well, she will get used to you.” The Doctor smiled in her direction, but gave the TARDIS a warning look, whispering: “Be nice now.”

“You traveling with the Doctor then?” Rose smiled and looked from one to the other.

“Yes, part time.” Clara nodded nudging the Doctor’s arm. “Am also a nanny and studying to be an English teacher.”

“Pretty and smart.” Rose laughed, but it sounded nervous. “Sounds like a busy schedule.”

“Oh, I manage.” Clara winked.

“Rose used to travel with me.” The Doctor explained and stood next to her, waiving his harms in her direction as if to present her to Clara. He was just as energetic as his past self, but seemed so much more physical. Rose would have to get used to that.

“You join us for the hunt then?” She moved towards the weapon. “This is your time?”

Rose nodded. “Been to the circus with my mum. Heard the TARDIS materializing and thought I’d have a look.”

The Doctor stood between them unsure and visibly nervous. Involuntarily he remembered Mickey Smith’s words from a very long time ago. _The misses and the ex, welcome to every man’s worst nightmare._ They seemed to get along well enough.

Clara wanted to pick up the gun, but the Doctor moved and took it in hand, before she could. He checked if anything got broken, when he threw it away. “Leave that to me, Clara. It’s not dangerous for humans but it was thrown together rather quickly and I don’t want it to explode in your hands.”

Clara nodded. She turned back to Rose, while starting to walk towards the doors. “She does seem to like you, though.” Her look was set on the center of the TARDIS. “You have to be someone very special indeed.”

Rose smiled her signature smile, tongue to her lips, and followed Clara towards the doors. “If you say so.”

“You are from his past, right? I wonder, why he never mentioned you.” Clara said it casually.

The Doctor had been following them but now stood still in his tracks.

The words hit home for Rose, who had used almost the same phrasing, when she had met Sarah Jane several months ago. Alright, she deserved them. The casual tone the other woman had used, did not give away if she had meant the words to hurt Rose or was genuinely interested. “It has been a while and—” she paused and turned to look at this dangly man, holding the heavy weapon like it was nothing. His face was impassive. “That is just how he is. How he has to be.”

The Doctor smiled a sad smile at Rose.

The three of them left the TARDIS and he closed the doors firmly behind them.

“Is that so?” Clara’s brow furrowed. She turned and looked their mutual friend. “Moving on? Forgetting us? That seems to be fairly easy to you, doesn’t it?”

The Doctor was taken aback by her sudden harsh tone. “Clara.” He started to protest.

“Who is Rose Tyler, Doctor?” Her eyes narrowed. “If she is so important to you, why not mention her? Is that what happens to us? You just forget, because the memory of us inconveniences you? We who help you save thousands, hundreds of thousands. We, whose lives are really on the line, whenever the TARDIS lands.”

Rose’s eyes were set on the Doctor. If Clara would have slapped him square in the face, he would not have shown a bigger flinch. He did not answer. His hands tensed up on the gun, and his head sank to his chest.

His hurting silence was enough to have Rose step forward and warn Clara: “Now you listen up. I never asked him to wallow over me, or mourn me for the rest of his lives. All has its time, all ends. I know the Doctor will keep on living long past I am gone. To demand he should never get over the loss of me, would be nothing but cruel.”

“But she is not wrong either.” The Doctor replied to that. He did not look at the women. His voice was cracking.

“Doctor.” Rose stepped close to him and put his hand on his shoulder.

“The two of you obviously have some unresolved issues.” Clara shook her head and looked at them. “Maybe we should split up. I will go behind the curtains and you can check the audience and stage.”

“We shouldn’t—” The Doctor warned half-heartedly looking up again. It was obvious he wanted to have this conversation with each Rose and Clara, different kinds of conversations, but in the end both just as hurting and worrisome.

“I don’t want to be with you right now.” Clara did not meet his eyes.

“It is too dangerous to—”

“Give me the gun then and keep watch over your precious Rose.” She moved towards him and lifted her hand.

He was about to give in and hand her the metal chunk, when he stopped in his tracks and took two steps back. Rose noticed how he had taken a protective stance in front of her.

 

~~~

 

A great variety of Christmas themed props greeted them, while _All I want for Christmas_ was cheered all over the tent. There were loads and loads of stuff and boxes, but everything seemed to have its order. The Doctor led them further behind the curtains, sneaking behind constructions waiting to be moved outside. There were only human acts and no animals, so the usual smell of manure and the sound of nervous hooves or paws were missing.

They walked further and managed to sneak past waiting acts. All the while, the Doctor scanned the area.

“Nothing here.” He could try just following the smell, but there was no track. It was all over the place. Someone must have moved it around quite a lot. It might just not even be behind the curtains. The tent was big and the Doctor did not know, how long they would have until the engine would malfunction.

They rounded a corner and Bill had to restrain a surprised yelp.

Christy was busy kissing one of the other dancers against a cylindrical structure, that seemed to be in use for one of the later acts. Bill stumbled over a bunch of juggler equipment and stepped backwards. She managed to hold on to a rope hanging from the ceiling, but stumbled again and over something hidden behind a roomy box. The couple jumped up in surprize. Not seeing who was watching them, they did not want to take the risk to be discovered and scattered to another part of the back stage.

“Well, somebody seems busy.” The Doctor only checked if Bill got hurt. When he saw everything was alright, he moved to inspect their surroundings again.

Bill looked after the couple with a weary smile. “Well, at least she really does date women, and I did not convince her out of pity to meet with me.”

She bent down to see what had caused the metal sound, when she had stumbled. Hopefully, she had not messed up somebodies equipment. But when she kneeled and removed a sheet wrapped around a long item, chains rattled and Bill discovered a girl stuck within them.

“Doctor?” She asked with wide eyes and looked from him back down to the pretty faced stranger. Her brown hair was pooling over her shoulders. She seemed unconscious.

He looked just as surprised, when he kneeled down on the other side of the still half in cloth wrapped bundle. Touching his glasses, they gave a swirl. The chains fell from the women. Bill helped her sit up and out of the rest of the sheet, while the Doctor slapped the strangers face.

“Wakey, wakey” he said. Somehow she looked familiar, but he did not think he had ever met her. Maybe he had forgotten about her? Usually this only happened when his own timelines were colliding. Had a past self of his tracked the signature of the leaking _Genellium_ and tried to find it as well? In his tenth body he had spent quite some time in London 2006 but he could not remember when Rose and he ever went to a Christmas Circus like this.

“Hey there, are you alright?” Bill hoped her words would reach the woman better than the Doctor’s manhandling.

 _Rose_ , there was something. He remembered something new. As if his past was changing right now, being rewritten. He got up. Rose in his TARDIS, not the old coral pillars, he had come to love in his grunge phase, the new design, metal and dark. And there was somebody else with them. Someone dear to him. He stopped. No. Not someone dear, was it?

The girl gave a beaten grunt while waking up. “Doctor?”

He whirled around.

Bill looked confused. “She knows you?” The older of the women moved back to give the stranger some room.

“What is your name?” The Doctor demanded to know.

She touched her head, still waking up. “I’m Clara, Clara Oswald.”

Instantly there was shock and remembrance on his face.


End file.
